My 3yo dd keeps picking on her 1yo little brother. She'll push him over, push her head into his and today I caught her trying to stand on his tummy when he was laying on the floor. I saw red and smacked her hard.
a) I don't want to smack her, it makes me feel like sh!t and is probably traumatising her
b) it's not working
So I've tried telling her it's not nice, to use gentle hands yada yada, pushing her when she pushes him (yeah, that's not working either), yelling, putting her in room and telling her she can come out when she's ready to play nicely and when I'm tired and over it, I smack.
She can play nicely with him and she generally plays nicely with other kids. So am I putting too much emphasis on this? Should I let them work it out themselves? I'm assuming O will push back one day.
What do/did you do when your toddler picks on the baby? I'm wondering if I should only intervene when she's actually hurting him which is rare.